Peace on earth, Goodwill toward...

The phone call came.

The phone rang Saturday morning at 1:30am.  

At first I didn't hear it because I unplugged the old 2.4 GHz telephone on my night stand and did not replace it.  Did you know that 2.4GHz phones use the same frequency as WI-FI?  Yeah.  That was one of the many silver bullets splattered all over my house when the Qwest guys couldn't figure out why I couldn't consistently load error free pages on any of the computers in the house, in spite of their instruments showing that there were no data transmission errors coming into my house.  How that particular bullet helped with the problem when the modem was plugged directly into the back of any of the computers (not using WI-FI) I still don't understand.  

But I digress...

Thing One called me in tears.  She was banished to the stateroom by everyone in the family AND the "nurse" from the cruise ship.  Apparently she had some flu-like symptoms and not surprisingly, the nurse covered her cruise ship ass by recommending a quarantine.  Duh.  What moron called the nurse in the first place?  Oh yes, it was Mr. Moron himself, Mr. Ex.

Thing One probably knew what the problem was.  After all, I hear she was out until 6am (unacceptable, so who is in charge out there??).  Like her rebel mother, Thing One did not comply with the quarantine.  Shit, she didn't fight like hell to get this cruise to happen so that she would be banished to a stateroom!  Screw the rest of the passengers (who likely were AT NO RISK at all!).  It's not like they are going to refund the trip and let her enjoy it later!

Her "loving" (NOT) grandmother (Mr. Ex's evil mother) threatened to "report her to the cruise authorities".  Honestly, my Ex and his idiot family REALLY think that those cruise ship people give a crap?

The girls had been fighting, there was even a fist fight (doesn't happen on my watch - I'd kick both their asses), there was drama...  and of course Thing One needed to hear my voice.

Crap.  This was not a problem to deal with at $2.50 per minute.

Yesterday there were a couple of emails exchanged between Mr. Ex and me (who fully blames Thing 1), and I sent a couple to Things 1 and 2.   I gave them the 'ol "big picture" lecture.  You know, the one where I remind them that you need to support, accept and love your family.   That in the end they are the ones that you will have - especially after your parents are gone. And that at least with your family you pretty much know what you are getting... That life is too short to spend precious times together fighting... blah, blah, blah.

Did I hear anything back from anyone?  Of course not.  They successfully interrupted my Zen with their drama, and when it got resolved they moved on to have fun, leaving me completely out of the loop.  I sent Mr. Ex and email to make sure everyone was o.k.  He finally replied late last night to tell me all was great and there would great pictures to share.

Golly, thanks, asshole.

What a bunch of assholes.

What's really sad is that they all, including Mr. Ex, need to have me involved to resolve their drama.  Geeze.

So now I need to get back into my peaceful groove.  I only get 2.5 more days of peace on my earth.  Sorry, I've got no Goodwill to offer men at the moment.