The Worst Nightmare

Today is Inauguration Day and a beautiful day. I feel such hope for the future of the country, and believe that brighter days are on their way. It may take a while, but it will come.



I needed today. I needed it because I survived a nightmare this weekend. Let me share.



On Sunday morning I woke up at about 8:30 a.m. Thing 1 had been on an overnight and was driving up to Flagstaff for a school project, so I knew where she was. Thing 3 slept with me, so I knew where he was. Thing 2 was in her bedroom because she kissed me goodnight at 9:00pm Saturday night and headed for her room.



I made myself a nice cup of tea, sat down with my laptop and read some news. I started to set up a Facebook account but quickly grew bored. I played a couple of card games.



Before I knew it it was 10:00a.m. It was a sunny and warm morning and I decided that I was going to get everyone up and get this house cleaned, teamwork style.



At first I was going to start with Thing 1, but I quickly remembered she wasn't home. I had to giggle at myself. When I realized my error I turned the other direction toward Thing 2's room. Thing 2 had been sick most of last week. She spent most of Tuesday through Friday asleep in her bed. She was the last one of the family to suffer with the stomach virus.



When I entered Thing 2's room I saw that she was snuggled deep in her covers. Her comforter is a hand-me-down from her older sister. The bedding set was sold under the MTV brand, known as "The Crib". It is black velvet with leopard print with gold sequin accent pillows. Certainly was not my first pick when purchased, but actually pretty cute on Thing 2's black wrought iron daybed. Looking at her snuggled under the covers made me chuckle. It seemed kind of mean to wake up someone so snuggled in. We have shudders on all of our windows, and when they are closed it is nice an dark in our bedrooms. We live at the end of a dirt road, so it is almost always very quiet. It is wonderful to sleep in in this house, and we often do.



In spite of my brief thoughts about letting her sleep, I decided it was a good thing to help Thing 2 get body clock back on track. I gently pulled her comforter back.



There were two large stuffed bunnies under the covers. Thing one was not there.



Without hesitation I called out her name. After hearing myself call her twice I realized that I was still staring at her bed in disbelief. After all, I had been out of bed for almost two hours. She had not gone for a walk or a jog - or she would be back.



I ran to Thing 3's room. His bed is a loft, so I climbed the ladder to make sure that she wasn't in his bed. She was not.



I double checked my own bed. Not there. I checked Thing 1's bed (but there is no way that anyone wants to go in there - it's gross). Not there.



I ran up to the roof. Thing 2 likes to go up on the roof and talk on the phone, play her guitar, or listen to her ipod. Not there.



I returned to her bedroom. I opened the shudder. The window was wide open and the screen was on the ground. It was clear that the screen had been stepped on - probably more than once.



I paced. I was wringing my hands. I think I was breathing very hard.



I was trying to be smart. I wondered what I had forgotten. Where could she be? We didn't have a fight, we didn't argue. There was no sign of any sort that would make me believe that she would leave.



Abduction? Could that be what happened? No, no way. Not to us.



I called my brother. I asked him what I should do. Should I call the police? He said to wait before calling the police.



By the time my brother got here I had called the police. I couldn't take a chance.



My bother looked all the same places. I asked him to look in the barn to see if the golf cart and the ATV's were there. I asked him to make sure that she had not fallen off the roof.



I looked over her room again. I was afraid to touch anything, naively thinking that I would disturb evidence. Her wallet and purse were both on the shelves right above her bed. All of her money was in the wallet. If she ran away, she took no money.



Her only sneakers were right on the floor next to her bed.

The police posted her as a runaway. A runaway? Don't runaways have problems at home and at school? Don't runaways leave because they have problems with their parents or their siblings, or drugs? O.K., though. She was a runaway.

Later, probably at least an hour later, we heard from her. She eventually gave us her location and my brother picked her up. She provided the most stupid story ever told. She claimed she went for a walk, lost track of time... she couldn't really explain why an exit through the window was necessary, however.

I explained, in a mean and loud voice, that if she actually thought that people would believe her story that she had to be high, so we bought a drug test. I watched her pee in a cup and I tested her for five or six different drugs. Not my finest parental moment, I assure you.

Happily, she passed the drug tests. All clear. No drugs.

I confiscated the phone, obtained all passwords, deleted the myspace account. We have been through several versions of where she was and what she did. The first story was the crazy one. The second story was plausible. A nearby household, parents out of town, a party, passing out, waking up and panicking. Trouble is, I checked the story. I called the family. They were all out of town.

Meanwhile, she received a text message from someone capable of obtaining alcohol. He said, "Damn Sweetheart, there must be some way I can see you tonight." (I still throw up a little in my mouth when I think about it.

I texted him back. I'm a little embarrassed about the profane nature of my reply to this a-hole, but suffice to say he is worried because he waited a couple of days before responding with his claims of it "not going that far, and Wes knows that".

So I dug deeper. I have now found out that she was picked up by a guy on a motorcycle, went to an apartment, drank too much, threw up a lot, passed out, woke up and panicked. She admitted to this after I had dug most of it up. She lied to protect a girlfriend who couldn't get out that night.
She met these guys through the girlfriend, and she knew I'd tell the girl's mother. Which I have now done.

We are moving ahead. The bond of trust is broken. I forgive her. I'm worried.

I dated a guy that was 18 when I was 14 or barely 15, so I see how this happens. However, my date came to the door, met my parents, took me on a date, brought me home safe and sound. Obviously, this is different.

We have a wonderful community of support here. I shared the story with Thing 3's teacher, who was also Thing 2's 5th grade teacher. She put me in touch with the police officer that taught my daughter in the 5th grade drug abuse prevention program, and he spent about an hour on the phone with me today. She won the essay contest about the program and the prize was a week long camp. He remembered her well. He has volunteered to speak to her if she is willing.

The police officer has suggested I try impersonating Thing 2 with the guy that contacted her. He suggested I come on to him to get evidence of what his motives are. He also suggested I try to get his address. I think you see where this could go.

I'm not sure I have the stomach for it. I'll just have to think about it.

Regardless of this mess, I'm grateful. I'm grateful she wasn't killed on the motorcycle, leaving us to wonder what happened. I'm grateful she tested drug free. I'm grateful that she was throwing up so much that she couldn't get a ride home. I'm grateful that she got caught. I'm grateful that I had the courage to check out her story, even though I didn't really want to. I'm proud that I dug deeper.

Parenting is really, really hard work. Single parenting is not ideal. However, I am most grateful and proud that I have family, friends, teachers, other parents, and even police officers that care about my child and have responded to me when I reached out for help. I think I have to accept that this is only the beginning.

What a ride.